The Ignorance of Jack Nicolson

The cat was lurking around in the backyard of my neighbor’s den. It climbed the brick-and-cement boarder wall and that’s when it noticed me. From the second floor balcony, Jack Nicolson was looking at our interaction.

Maybe the cat was not looking at me. It’s eyes were fixated towards my direction but there was no way I could figure out its depth perception. I turned towards Jack Nicolson and asked him in Nepali,”Kaslai herirako hola?” Whom do you think it’s looking at? He looked away and went back to his own business.

Realizing that, I asked the cat, whom I decided to name Lady Gaga, “What do you think is Jack Nicolson’s business?”

I imagined that if the cat spoke any of my languages she would say something, but not, “Actor hola actor. He must be an actor.” What a lie, Lady Gaga. Everyone is an actor. You are an actor too.

It was at that moment Jack Nicolson made a deep noise from his throat and flew away.

***

This story was inspired by Kumar Nagarkoti’s book Docha. In the book, he names his neighborhood’s pigeon Jack Nicolson. Why can’t a cat be named Lady Gaga?

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